S2S A FAIR Asessment

I decided to write a fair assesment of the prodcts that I used from S2S. Since I LOVE my Qhemet products SO much, it was very hard to be objective. At any rate, the Lavish cleasning Phoo was very slippery and gentle. The oil moisturizer was light, nogreasy and moisturinzing. However....I had a pretty bad reaction (face and body broke out) and I have since tossed the products. I will HAVE to stick to my Qhem's. I have some Wheatgrass cleansing tea on the way. I haven't used it in a long time and I will post my reviews once it gets here.

Hair length

I measured my hair at 2 1/2 inches for the most part. There are a couple of places in the back (where it seems to grow fastest) where it is almost three inches long. I think the front is the slowest growing area overall. I am in the TWA grow out challenge on Nappturality. I originally thought the goal was to have 5 inches of hair at the end of 2009, which I thought would be easy. However, I think the goal is to have inches of growth in a year. I THINK I can do it, but it took about 6 months for me to get to this point, so I might get 4 inches in a year. I really think that my growth rate (assuming that I can retain all of the length) is 4 inches per year, which is slower than the average rate of 6 inches per year. So, if I'm lucky, I'll have a total of 6 inches at the end of 2009. We'll see. I don't think I've been there in a while. The first year that I was natural, I grew my hair out pretty well. Of course, after I started combing, etc, I lost a lot of length. Now that I am being gentle with my hair and dampen it prior to picking, I may actually get lucky. My overall gal is 8-10 inches of hair. I don't think have EVER had that much hair! I want a 2 inch shrunken fro so that I can wear cute scarves. Plus, 2 inches bulk is all that I can wear in uniform. If my hair got longer, I would actually be able to pull to back. That is something that I haven't been able to do since going natural. I think I need 10-12 inches for that. My head is pretty big, so in order for the bangs to stretch all the way to the back, it has to be pretty long. I'm trying not to get too hung up on length, but I would like to pull my hair back.

My daughter's hair looks awesome since I redid her cornrows. I LOVE it. I think I'll achieve my goals for her hair. I would like for her thin patches to be three inches long (and full) by the summer. I don't know why the same patches get thinned out. I have to look at my styling methods. No more rubber bands these days. I did a really good trim in October, I think. I cut quite a bit off to even it up. As her hair grows out, I plan to keep it trimmed to a certain length so that it can fill in. We'll see how it goes.

PICKING AGAIN!

Well, I whipped out my Widu the other day and began to pick out my hair. My concensus is that I prefer my hair picked out, so that is what I do, however, I have had to figure out a better way to get through my hair now that it is growing out. I use the Qhemet Amla and olive heavy cream daily and it works for me.

My daughter's hair fared MUCH better on wash day. I realize that the culprit for breakage is DEFINITELY rubberbands and SLS-based shampoo. Rubber bands cause breakage because her hair gets all wrapped and tangled around them and I end up ripping out her hair when I take them out. Shampoo (SLS-based) makes her hair brittle. I think her cuticles get raised. I would never have believed this until I saw the damage for myself. We have a long way to go but I think we can get there now. On wash day, I used the extra honey beer and egg shampoo bar from Chagrin Valley Soap and Crafts. It is really gentle and it actually gets her hair and scalp clean.

I scored!

I ordered three jars of Qhemet's Amla and Olive Heavy Cream during the sale today! I am so happy. It really works well for me and I was tempted to get some of the other products but decided that it would be unneccessary. I am happy with the results that I am getting, so I don't need anything else.

I rebraided my daughter's hair last night. I think I pretty much have the concept down. Armed with the heavy cream and a spray bottle of water, I was able to do a pretty good job with her hair. I am on the path of acceptance of her frizz because almost as soon as I get her hair finished it looks a couple of days old. Oh well.

I am pretty bored with my hair. Now that I don't comb/pick it I see little white balls in my hair occasionally. They are from shed hair. I'm not really sure what (if anything) I should do about this. I have read many posts on hair boards where people have stated that they clear out the shed hair with a Denman brush and whatnot, but I think that would be damaging to my hair. Hmmmm.......

What to do??

Okay, so the purpose of this blog is to talk about FRAGILE hair. Today, my concern is with my daughter's hair. I've allowed her to wear it in an afro for the last few days but it was not looking so hot I decided to put it in cornrows. Armed with a spray bottle of water and very GENTLY pulling the hair apart with the comb and parting it SLOWLY, I did okay and kept from damaging her hair TOO much. I noticed SEVERAL patches in her hair where the hair was less than an inch long and I REALLY think that rubber bands were the culprit. When I used to take her hair down and shampoo it, I would notice SO much hair going down the drain. The last couple of times that I washed it, however, she did not lose NEARLY as much hair. I haven't been using my old standby Suave Daily Clarifying either, so I think that helps with the brittleness. I'm hoping that in six months I can get the growth back for her with my NEW gentle methods and great products. I would like to even her hair up as well, but we'll see how it goes. No more rubber bands for her!! I've thrown them out, so we'll see how it goes.

IT'S OVER NOW!!!

I've figured it out! Keep it simple!! Cleanse, moisturize daily pick and go!! It CAN't get much eaiser than this!!

MY NEW SHAMPOO

Hey fragile-haired friends!! Today I made my own shampoo. I basically had about 3-4 ozs of veggie glycerin that I poured into a bottle of about 8-12 ounces of castile soap. The soap of choice was the peppermint kind. I was AMZED at how soft my hair felt after shampooing!! I tried to do an ACV rinse after that and it made my hair hard so I won't be doing that again! I am so happy!! Now I have my regimen totally down. I shampoo with my homemade mixture and then apply the Qhemet Amla and Olive Heavy Cream, pick and go! I also use the AOHC on my daughter's hair and it feels great!!! No more Blue Magic!

OH MY SCALP!!!

Okay, so I was using the Leche de Coco from Asha's and I woke up one morning with my scalp itchy and inflamed. The only thing different in that product from what I have been using is the ylang ylang. so what now?? Well, I have some Qhemet on the way and I can't wait to get it. I tried using my daughter's Blue Magic (wonderful for HER hair) and it makes my hair virtually IMPOSSIBLE topick out, so I won't be able to continue using it. I remeber that from times past. It DOES soften my hair, but it HURTS to pick it out after I use that stuff. So right now I'm STUCK unless I just use plain olive oil, which causes my hair to be hard when used alone. This is a hrd road for me right now. I think I'll be oaky as long as the heavy cream doesn't affect me. at least THEN I will have SOMETHING that I can count on. Perhaps the sulfur in it will help my scalp. We shall see.

MY CRAZY HAIR GOAL.....

Ok, so here goes...I want a TWO INCH SHRUNKEN FRO!! Think I can do it?? Well, I'm no mathemetician, but right now, my shrunken fro (on a good day) looks to be about 1/2 of an inch long. I would say that it is about 2 inches long (or so) stretched right now. So, I figured that in order to have a two inch shrunken fro, I will need about 8 or more inches of growth. Since I have never accomplished this, it seems like an incredible feat. However, if I keep mamnaging it the way that I do right now, I should be able to get there by next summber. I'll keep 'ya posted!!

PRODUCTS

Okay, so here's my rant on products!! I'm having a hard time figuring it out!! I will use something new and then my scalp will be on fire. I recently decided to go back to Asha's MA and I also have some Qhemet Biologic's Amla and Olive Heavy Cream on the way. MA was my old love and then I decided that I no longer liked it, but I think I'm just crazy when it comes to my hair because NOTHING really affects my carpet all that much. I mean, there are some things that soften it more than others (alas my ghee...SIGH) but overall it STILL looks the same! SO WHY DO I KEEP PUTTING MYSELF THROUGH THIS????!!!!! I just need to get a few key things and step on! I think it's my devotion to the hair boards that gets me caught up at times. I think what will help is if I go ahead and just uuse distilled water. It is very time consuming, though and there was only one brand that really worked well and then I couldn't find it on the shelves. I think it was Ozark or SOMETHING. At any rate, I'll give it a try again because I think it will really help both mine AND my daughter's scalps since we BOTH get that flakiness and itchiness that probably comes from the water being so hard here. I ordered some of Asha's rosemary mint shampoo. This stuff actuially WORKED on my daughter's hair if I used distilled water, but NOT with regular tap water. Her scalp was doing better back then too! The only thing that works well with our hard water is Suave Daily clarifying, which is EXTREMELY drying and stripping to our hair. I am TIRED of having my hair feel dry and stripped. ARRRGGGGHHHH!!! I did like the Qhemet's wheatgrass cleansing tea as well, though. I think it would work better with distilled water also.

The Sophia's Old fashioned hair grease ended up making sores on my scalp, but my daughter's hair and scalp are still holding up extrmely well, so I think I'll keep using it on her.

I used some whipped pudding this morning and my hair is soft but I don't think my scalp likes the added fragrance, so maybe I'll get an unscented jar down the line.

I think that Asha's MA has the BEST fragrance of any product that I've ever used.

Oyin is AWESOME on damp hair and it helps with detangling, but I NEED to get it unscented. My hair feels GREAT now that it has dried!

HAIR GREASE

Okay, so I got some Sophia's Old-Fashioned Hair Grease from www.myhoneychild.com and I like it. The fragrance is STRONG and FRUITY, though. It smeels a LOT like Kemi Oyl. It DID soften my hair a bit and I am hoping that it will work on my daughter's hair as well. Her hair is currently caked with everything from Motion's oil moisturizer (which I took back) to Blue Magic hair and scalp conditioner (also known as grease) so I can't WAIT to wash it and apply ONLY the SOFHG. I like the way that it layed her hair down. I basically do the same thing with both of our heads each morning. I spray our hair with water and then procced to style. Proceed to to style (for me) means that I use my Widu pick and lift my hair all over. For my daughter, I use an ACE comb that is AWESOME for detangling. I use Suave Daily Clarifying shampoo for my daughter and it usually takes three lathers to get all of the grease out of her hair. That is a LOT of washing!

I miss my Qhemet but I sent it out yesterday to someone who can use it! I feel sad about that but I HAVE to press on! My next order from Qhem is the heavy cream. I have to give it ONE more try because creams work BEST for me. The hair grease is nice, but the creams PENETRATE and soften better. I LOVE soft hair.

MY SCALP!!!! ARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!

Ok, so my BELOVED ghee is causing my scalp to flake. I think it is the conditioner ingredients that are the culprit. By this, I mean the Behentrimonium methosulfate and the cetyl alcohol. Those products work wonderfully in my hair as a detangler, but they should not be left in. Having said that, I think my alternative would be a "hair grease" type of product. I ordered some of "Sophia's Old-fashioned hair grease". It was a toss up between that and La'Vida Given by Nature's ginger and berries. There was a couple of reasons why I did not order that product. 1) PRICE. 2) Orange oil. I avoid that stuff like the PLAGUE!!! I hope I like this stuff because right now I am using B&B's "extra lite" hair grease. I like it okay, but I DO NOT Like using minera oil or petrolem based products on my skin. I hope it doesn't take very long to ship. Some online stores take a month! Other than the latest scalp issu, my hair is thriving, but greas DOES give it more shrinkage. Ahhh wellll.....

OLD SCHOOL STUFF

Welllll.....I've tried to make the things that work for MY hair work for my daughter's hair, but hers seems to thrive with petroleum based stuff. I mean, her scalp looked healthier the last time I simply shampooed it and applied Blue Magic to it. There are plenty of people who probably remember this product. It comes in several formulations (just found that out a few months ago) but the most popular ones are the blue or green formula. My stepmommy always preferred the green one. It has ingredients in it like lecithin, lanolin, and olive oil. When I apply this stuff to my daughter's hair, it makes it easier to manage. I'm thinking of getting some Pink Oil moisturizer for her hair, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to venture out to that yet. I put her hair in the most adorable cornrows last night and she looks so cute! I am trying to get the top layers (her hair seems weaker there) to grown down over the bottom ones.

As far as my hair goes, I STILL LOVE the detangling ghee from Qhemet. It is expensive, so I'm watching closely in order to get a feel for how often I'll need to order it. A 5oz jar is $14, but it works so well in my hair. I remember being able to get my hair to feel like this in the past, but I can't seem to get the same products to work for me these day. Also, I can apply this product to my dry hair and it works wonders for helping me to shape my fro without adding additional water.

Should I GIVE UP the COMB???

If you know anything about me, you know that I have been singing the praises of the Widu comb. Shoot...I even posted about it on this blog. Well, after reading what my hair twin wrote, I'm wondering if I shoudl just abandon the comb altogether? I've done just that in the past, but then I never had a Widi pick. It worked really well in my daughter's hair this morning. Now, my daughter's hair is a totally different story. My goal is to get her hair fairly even all over and possibly be able to get it all in one littel bunny tail. I KNOW that is a big stretch for our hair, but if the back of her hair can be evenm why can't the rest of it? I think that once the brakage starts growing out (due to a whole new regimen) she will be fine. MOST of the problems came from the MECHANICS of how I HANDLED her hair. DRY COMBING is the devil and yet I consistently combed her hair while it was dry. More on that later....

This is it......

Okay, so I have the MOST shrinkage of any Napp out there!! I DARE ya to say any different. My friend gave me an old pic and I was looking at it and remembering the weekend that it was taken and JUST how hard it was for me to get a pick through my hair due to shrinkage. I had SO many knots and tangles back then. My hair HAD to be about six inches and it barely looked like one inch. In fact, you could see the headband in back (not cute) and I was TRYING to have a faux puff and it just wasn't WORKING for me that day!! LOL!! Fast forward to today and I have figured out all of the basics and now I think my hair will be able to retain MORE length because I am ALL DONE with the fluffy puff. you know the one....you braid and twist and let it stretch out overnight and it's larger than life! LOL!! Well, In order to get that look to work for me I either have to spend a LOOOOOOOONNNNNNNGGGGG time shaping with my fingers or pick it, which is a NO-NO!! I should NEVER pick my hair when dry!!!! I will just have to hope that MAYBE I can get 10-12 inches of hair so that I can have a two to three inch fro. Will it happen? We shall see. I also have the issue of my temples! They do not grow as much (or they shrink more?) so when I DO have a fro and wear a headband it looks like it's it higher in the very front(behind the headband) and that is a hot mess. I have a pic that hubby and I took in a booth and I had that look going on. NOT cute!! So....with all of these issues, what's a girl to do? I think a chunky fro (or not SO evenly picked out) makes my hair look better. These days I have been using my Widu pick and it is SO easy on my hair it's ridiculous. Here's a link to one....www.widu.com. I LOVE my pick!! I do not endorse ANY kind of brushes or combs for MY hair twins. However, if you MUST brush, do so at your own risk. For me, that is definitely a recipe for disaster. My fro makes that famous UHHHHHOOOGUH!!! sound with bugged eyes when I even THINK about it.

WHY??

Why have we been so bombarded with images of straight hair? What if we saw images daily of women with kinky hair and they got the best jobs? Would people be trying to kink their hair? Hmmmmm......

FRAGILE HAIR CARE: FRAGILE HAIR 101

FRAGILE HAIR CARE: FRAGILE HAIR 101

FRAGILE HAIR CARE: I FOUND MY THRILL!!

FRAGILE HAIR CARE: I FOUND MY THRILL!!

I FOUND MY THRILL!!

I recently decided to try Qhemet's Cocoa Tree Detangling ghee. I LOVE this product. It has the scent of dark chocolate due to the virgin cocoa butter. This product gives great slip and keeps my hair soft all day! I also love the fact that it does not contain fragrances or harsh preservatives that will make my scalp itch. I have been through a LOT of products in my day, so I KNOW when I've found a keeper. Get yours at www.qhemetbiologics.com.

One other thing that I LOVE is my WIDU pick. I will not part with that thing. In my experience, kinky hair needs widely spaced teeth in order to keep from being torn out. I have noticed that since I keep certain combs in my reach, I do a lot better. I cut my hair off REALLY short, but hubby didn't like that (and to be honest, I was over it very quickly) so I am growing it back. I need to be gentle so that I don't do so much damage. What I typically do is apply some water (using my spray bottle) to my fro and then I apply the moisturizer after that. My hair is very easy to pick out if I handle it that way. DRY picking is a no-no!! DON'T DO IT if you have hair like mine!!!

FRAGILE HAIR 101

I typed this essay after dealing with my hair for 4 years. I KNOW that there are a LOT of kinky hair-care books floating about out there, but this is my interpretation of what I have learned when dealing with fragile, kinky hair.

FRAGILE HAIR CARE

Due to mounting frustration with my kinky, fragile hair I have cut it short many times. Recently, I began to realize a few key factors in retaining length on the type of hair that I have on my head. My hair shrinks up very compactly to my scalp. In fact, it appears to be thick due to the amount of shrinkage it has, but the real story is that it is very fine and fragile. It will never show its true length unless stretched by braiding or twisting. If you can imagine a 6 inch spring that compacts down to one inch, you can picture my hair precisely. If you have kinky, tightly compacted hair, here are some tips for length retention and maintenance.

1) MOST combs/picks are no-no's. However, the RIGHT comb/pick can be used when the hair is DAMP and moisturized. In the case of my daughter’s hair, I made my own comb by purchasing an ACE comb and breaking off the closely fit bristles to form a handle while leaving the widely spaced teeth on the other end. The particular comb that I use is easily ordered online at Amazon.com.

2) Forget the shampoo commercials! Piling the hair on the head and twisting it around is a recipe for disaster on kinky hair! Gently squeeze and manipulate the hair. Most of the cleansing process (i.e. massaging) should be focused on the scalp while utilizing the lather to get build-up off of the strands. Gently pat or squeeze moisture from the hair with a towel. Vigorous rubbing will cause damage. Your hair may also retain more moisture with the use of shampoo on a regular basis due to the fact that fine strands are more susceptible to build-up which will keep moisture out.

3) Conditioner may be fun to use, but it is not a necessity. May people will disagree with this, but I have looked at many bottles of conditioner in my day. Most commercial conditioners are wax-based, which may make your hair feel silkier, but in the long run it is not doing anything major for your hair. There are herbal rinses and various concoctions out there that are touted to strengthen the hair, but if your hair is healthy to begin with and you aren’t damaging it, that shouldn’t be an issue. The conditioning process seems to be more therapeutic than anything else. Feel free to use conditioner, but don’t set high expectations on a bottle of wax!


4) A good moisturizer/detangler must have “slip”. Slip is a quality that aids in detangling, and minimizes breakage. It allows the comb to sort of “glide” through the hair. Different things work for best for different hair types. For some, it is the good ole-fashioned hair grease that does the trick. For others, it is a cream-based product that works its magic. Some even prefer oil-free products such as glycerin-based sprays. The choice is personal. Please be advised that traditional detanglers are often laden with silicones that can coat the hair and cause build-up, which can make the hair hard.

3) Combing/picking/detangling for kinky hair is not like what you see on T.V. You will NEVER be able to simply “run a comb through” your hair. You must use gentle, “plucking” movements. Even then, you will have some breakage. Do not be alarmed! This is inherent due to the fact that there are several bends and kinks in the strand. However, your shoulders and bathroom floor should not be coated with broken hairs at the end of a detangling session. As you get savvier with the detangling process, you will see less breakage. As your hair gets longer you will need to grab the section of hair close to the scalp and detangle from the roots to the ends. Do not simply put the comb/pick in the hair at the roots and tear your way down your strands!

4) Keep it simple! There are a lot of hair boards out there and they are awesome! However, in the early stages of getting familiar with your natural, kinky crown, it is easy to become a product junkie while in search of the “holy grails” Many people love deep conditioning treatments, hair rinses, exotic oils, etc. Experience has proven for many people, however, that a simple routine of cleanse, condition (or not) and moisturize will do very well. In fact, a good moisturizer can function as a "leave in" conditioner.

5) Protective styles tend to work in your favor. If you want to minimize breakage, it is ideal to put the hair up in twists, braids or other styles that you can create and forget for a while. However, if faced with a situation where a sensitive scalp or other lifestyle concern does not allow for protective styles, be careful if you manipulate your hair daily.

6) Please do not allow the typical standards of beauty to dictate to you how you handle or style your hair. . My hair retained significant length the first year that I wore it natural because I kept it simple and I RARELY EVER combed my hair. I did a lot of finger styling and I was fine with my hair’s appearance. It was not until I became more in tune with what others thought that I began to destroy my hair. On a good hair day, my hair will appear chunky and wild, which can be undesirable in the “straight, flowing hair” mentality that is so prevalent in our society. On my hair, I have to avoid twists, braids, cornrows, or most of the styles that seem to work on kinky hair. It doesn’t really seem to matter if I use protein treatments or not, because twisting and manipulating my hair inevitably leads to tangles, which then leads to breakage. Now, I still do these styles occasionally, but I just have to accept the breakage that comes with it. My hair looks very deceiving because it has about 90% shrinkage, so if someone sees my hair, they think it’s thick and can withstand pulling/yanking and combing. I could have 10 inches of hair and it MIGHT shrink down to 2 inches. Needless to say, I have never had 10 inches of hair because of my insistence on combing. I still have to learn not to be so rough when applying moisturizer to my loose hair, because simply rubbing in a moisturizer will cause breakage, so as my hair gets longer, I will need to learn a new technique for applying moisturizer.

7) Learn to accept your hair! In a world where long, flowing hair is considered the desirable norm, short kinky hair is often lauded as ugly or a thing to be pitied. That is definitely not the case. Not everyone will have long hair! Now, I know that there are people out there who will disagree with this, but I believe that there is a predetermined length that the hair will grow. If you truly desire to discover your max length, you can try
placing the hair in braids and keeping them in (with touch-ups, of course) for a year or two. If you handle the hair in the ways described above, employ a gentle braider, and still only see 6 inches of hair after two years, then it is safe to assume that your max length is six inches.

In a nutshell, if you have hair that is like mine (and you probably wouldn’t be reading this if you didn’t) be gentle, have patience, and ENJOY YOUR HAIR!!!!!